10 Tips For Successful Divorced Parenting

While divorce can be a traumatic experience for children, research shows that the manner in which the divorce couple parent their children can do much to influence the long term effect that divorce will have on the childrens' lives.

Tip 1. Provide stability for the children. If at all possible minimize the disruption to your childrens' routine. For example, if possible, the children should continue to live in the same house and continue to attend the same school. It is also important to ensure that the children maintain their standard of living and the necessary financial arrangements, including the timely payment of adequate child maintenance payments, should be made.

Tip 2. Don't draw your children into your battles. Don't try to draw your children into disputes with your former spouse by asking them to take sides. It might be comforting in the short term to have their support but, in the long term, you will almost certainly damage their relationship with both your former spouse and yourself.

Tip 3. Keep your problems away from the children. It is very important that you do not argue or fight with your former spouse in front of the children. If there long running arguments, or new arguments over things like financial support or visitation, then sort this out when the children are not around.

Tip 4. Don't use your children to carry messages. It's perfectly acceptable to ask your children to pass on 'everyday' messages but don't ask them to pass on messages which could draw them into an argument or dispute between yourself and your former spouse. It's alright to say, 'tell you father that I can take you to your dance class on Saturday if it's difficult for him to get the time off' but don't pass on messages such as 'tell you father that he's a week late his child support payment again'.

Tip 5. Don't use your children to 'spy' for you. You might be dying to know what your former spouse is up to but don't use your children to find out. Avoid 'prying' questions such as 'who is your father dating at the moment?'

Facebook use in pre-teens 'bad parenting' says cyber-safety expert - ABC Online
17 May 2012 at 2:43am

Facebook use in pre-teens 'bad parenting' says cyber-safety expert
ABC Online
Download this mp3 file A former Victoria Police officer turned cyber-safety consultant says parents who let their children go on facebook before they are teenagers 'are no...

Texting-while-driving: Teens do because we do - Washington Post (blog)
15 May 2012 at 11:42am

Texting-while-driving: Teens do because we do
Washington Post (blog)
Many teenagers act the same way now. Except today they have so many more pressing distractions when they're behind the wheel. And, they have some pretty terrible role models, as pa...

The Secret Online Lives of Tweens: What Parents Can Do - Mobiledia
16 May 2012 at 11:54am

Mobiledia
The Secret Online Lives of Tweens: What Parents Can Do
Mobiledia
By Margaret Rock Teens and tweens are creating online profiles and increasingly living through the Internet, offering challenges to parents who must grasp the new realities an...

Deborah Ross: Are you a teen having trouble with your parents? I can help - T...
16 May 2012 at 2:12pm

Deborah Ross: Are you a teen having trouble with your parents? I can help
The Independent
Consequently, I have decided to introduce a similar voucher scheme for children, particularly teenagers, to spend on classes which will help them deal with the...